As things do, mine and Becca’s drama had ended and we moved on as though nothing ever happened.

Our reconciliation looked like a bundle of dope and a bottle of liquor. Things quickly returned to “normal” within our house of horrors. As the drugs returned to the group without interruption so did the toxicity of the situation.

Joe was arrested for one thing or another (I can’t really remember) and so I moved back downstairs to Tom and Stacey’s place. Tom wasn’t there anymore he had had enough of the chaos and went to stay with his dad. So it was just Stacey and I and whatever entourage of people she was surrounding herself with that day.

Kevin was still coming by as regular as before, and things were, well they were things. It didn’t take long for the shit show to start to fall apart. The landlord came to me about him evicting Stacey due to non-payment and wanted to know if I could take the place over.

The man had no idea I was just as big of an addict and liked me so he wanted to save me the trouble of looking for someplace to live. I knew I couldn’t do it alone so I asked Becca if she wanted to move in and help me keep the place. She was all for it.

It didn’t take long to move her from her parents to the apartment and just like that, we were on our own ready to have a blast.

There was nothing standing in our way. Her boyfriend could come over whenever and we could do whatever we wanted when we wanted without worry of causing an issue for anyone else. This was a form of freedom she and I had never had before.

A freedom we never should have had…..

At every stage, addiction is driven by one of the most powerful, mysterious, and vital forces of human existence. What drives addiction is longing — a longing not just of brain, belly, or loins but finally of the heart.     

Cornelius Platinga
About the Author

Brandy Clear is woman who has walked down some of the darkest paths life has to offer. She has taken a lot of these steps alone. As she has rebuilt her life and self she has made it her mission to be the light to as many people as she can. She wants no one to have to walk alone in the dark. She does not want to save you, she just wants to remind you that you are not alone.

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