Becca and Steve’s sneaking around went unnoticed to the outside of our circle for a surprisingly long time. Once it was picked up on though it was being used against them both as often as those around them saw fit.

Joe and I stayed out of the crap, we confirmed and denied nothing. It was always “I don’t know” or ” I haven’t noticed”. This was mostly because we like our house calm and chaos-free as often as we could get it. Those getting involved just thought if they threatened to tell they would get something tangible out of them.

The upside to playing dumb was they started to spend a lot of time hanging out with us. They did this for one reason, they could trust us to keep anything said or done in our presence to ourselves, so they would tell their significant others that they were with one of us and well they weren’t technically lying to anyone, and with Becca and Steve came drugs.

Due to their need to see one another and not get caught Joe and I went months being able to save our drugs for us and just do theirs.

I never had a lot of money and at the time most of the money I did get already had a place to go. I was oddly responsible that way, granted I didn’t have a job or really my own place but I always made sure I got by. So if doing someone else’s drugs to save me from worrying about getting them was the way I had to go it was the way I went.

I knew a lot of people who had lost their homes and belongings to dope but I had never really had that experience myself. Not having your own place helps with that I guess. Drugs were actually never the reason a living situation didn’t work out for me.

You see the two of them were in a much better place than the two of us were. I had no job and got money form whatever assistance (if any) I was receiving at the time or by little odd jobs I would do for people I knew. Joe, well Joe sold pot and some other drugs but from time to time he would have an actual job.

Becca lived at home with her mom and dad who both worked and made decent money she also had a part-time job and a boyfriend who worshiped her, so she rarely wanted for anything. Steve had a really good full-time job and his girlfriend had a job she made decent money at (she was a stripper and let’s face it they make good money).

When the two of them were in the same room there were often more drugs than the four of us could do, but we tried anyway.

“I used to think a drug addict was someone who lived on the far edges of society. Wild-eyed, shaven-headed and living in a filthy squat. That was until I became one…” ― Cathryn Kemp

About the Author

Brandy Clear is woman who has walked down some of the darkest paths life has to offer. She has taken a lot of these steps alone. As she has rebuilt her life and self she has made it her mission to be the light to as many people as she can. She wants no one to have to walk alone in the dark. She does not want to save you, she just wants to remind you that you are not alone.

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