Most of my life I heard about how I went out of my way to be different. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case. Things would have actually been way easier if I had been trying to be different then being normal wouldn’t have been so damn hard.

By the time I hit middle school I was over being “different”, the problem was I didn’t know how to be like everyone else. I had no idea how to think like them or look like them or even act like them.

School was a place I would have rather not gone. Learning wasn’t easy for me at all it never had been. By middle school the others kids noticed this way more than they ever did in elementary school; they pointed it out much more as well. They already had plenty to pick on me for and my lack of quick progression just added to their already long list.

The worse the kids got the worse I got. I began lashing out in both verbally and physically aggressive ways, both at home and in school.

The lashing out at home wasn’t really new, my mother and sisters had been dealing with it for years at this point. Lashing out as school was known to happen but not as often as it had started to and not to the extent that it was occurring.

I had very little control over myself, I just reacted to everything with too much emotion. That emotion typically being rage; not anger but rage. I found myself right back to being unable to control all the things happening inside of me.

I was so unaware of how much worse it would get before understanding would even be an option.

” A child’s mental health is just as important as their physical health and deserves the same quality of support.”
– Kate Middleton

About the Author

Brandy Clear is woman who has walked down some of the darkest paths life has to offer. She has taken a lot of these steps alone. As she has rebuilt her life and self she has made it her mission to be the light to as many people as she can. She wants no one to have to walk alone in the dark. She does not want to save you, she just wants to remind you that you are not alone.

View Articles