For as long as I can remember I have had this reoccurring dream, it’s the exact same dream…..every single night.

I can’t recall a night that I didn’t have this dream. It is literately the first dream of the night and typically happens as I start to really fall asleep. It sucks for few reasons but mostly because once it wakes me it takes me forever to get comfortable enough to allow myself to attempt the sleep thing again.

I don’t tend to have the dream more than once a night no matter how often I wake up and go back to sleep, but it happens every night. It has fuled my desire to stay awake for days at a time.

As the dream starts in a short distance ahead of me I see a huge old building that appears to be abandoned. (It reminds me of an old asylum) It’s made of stone and is extremely dated in both style and location. Around me I don’t see much else but tree lines off in a dark distance. As I slowly approach the extravagant yet dilapidated staircase I begin to feel uneasy.

I ignore this feeling and slowly begin to climb the stairs. With every step I am riddled with fear and anxiety, and as I hit the halfway point; I trip and fall.

As this happens my body jerks from the “fall” and I am wide awake filled with fear I don’t understand. I have had this dream so much that sometimes as it’s starting I know it’s a dream. I know exactly what will happen and when and how and I still wake up scared with a racing heart.

I still have this dream and I still, from time to time stay awake for days at a time trying to avoid it. I still haven’t made it to the top of the stairs.

“I still get nightmares. In fact, I get them so often I should be used to them by now. I’m not. No one ever really gets used to nightmares.” Mark Z. Danielewski