Things at Tom and Stacy’s was getting out of hand, they were fighting almost all the time and Tom was bouncing between staying with us and his dad. I was bouncing between Stacy’s house and upstairs with Joe.

Things were always missing from around the house and it wasn’t just Tom’s stuff this time, some of my things had come up missing. So I bought a lock for my bedroom door and never left the house with out making sure all my stuff was locked in my room.

Stacy had owed so many people (drug dealers) money that her phone was ringing always and there was even a time or two they had showed up at the door looking for her and their money.

It was getting so out of hand that she would take off for hours at a time, which left the rest of us to be the ones on the other side of the door when they came knocking.

Most of the time I wouldn’t answer the door at all or I would go upstairs and hang out with Joe just so that I “wasn’t home”.

For the most part though the people showing up really were not interested in taking the issues out on us just her. Tom however more than once just couldn’t let that happen. So he would pay off her debt and in just a few short weeks we would be right back to avoiding the knocks on the door.

That Thanksgiving, like Thanksgiving morning a brick came through the front window as we were all standing there some of us getting ready to head out for the day others getting high for the day.

We all stopped dead and just froze. Tom suddenly starting screaming at Stacy about how someone was going to get hurt and it was going to be all her fault. I just locked my room grabbed my stuff and headed to my mother’s for a day of family (yes I was sober I stopped going to my mom’s house high a long time ago which is where she hardly ever saw me).

That night I got home and Joe was on the porch and he said to me “Tom moved his stuff out, I suggest you get out too it’s getting dangerous here”. I had no place else to go and so I snickered and told him I would be fine. It took 2 hours before I packed all my stuff up and moved it upstairs to Joe’s apartment.

He and I had gotten high and I explained to him there was no way I could leave and why. He came up with an easy solution, move upstairs.

He was almost never home during the day and when he would get home it was usually late as hell so I would pretty much live a lone for the most part, and he would feel better that there was someone home when he wasn’t ( he was a bit paranoid so he liked knowing someone was in the house while he was gone to help prevent well any bad thing that could occur while he was out).

“Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t handle drugs.” 
― Robin Williams

About the Author

Brandy Clear is woman who has walked down some of the darkest paths life has to offer. She has taken a lot of these steps alone. As she has rebuilt her life and self she has made it her mission to be the light to as many people as she can. She wants no one to have to walk alone in the dark. She does not want to save you, she just wants to remind you that you are not alone.

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